How many times have we told a white lie? Just a little one so we don’t hurt our friend’s feelings. When is a white lie ok? When is it ok to just not say something and make it a “needs to know” or “doesn’t need to know” situation? Can we all really be 100% truthful? Today’s attribute of Dharma is Satyam, truthfulness. It is not just about not telling lies but also being up front.
New flash! Yes, in my lifetime I have told a white lies or have just out right lied about something. And most of those times it was for one of two reasons. First, I didn’t think it would be too big of a deal or second, to attempt to cover my butt when I did something that I probably shouldn’t have done. My 2017 was overall a pretty good year but ended on a very sour note because of non-truthfulness. Because some one close to me decided to hide something from me that they knew would upset me. In their mind, it really wasn’t a big deal and it was just better if I didn’t know about it. When I had a suspicion and asked about it, this person decided not to tell me the truth. I fell upon the truth a couple of weeks later and, man, was I angry, disappointed, and sad. When we are honest we are better able have trust in our relationships, whether it is with a spouse, friend, co-worker, parent, and we will benefit from stronger emotional support systems. I have since moved past this argument but undoubtedly it hurt my feelings. I hope that I won’t have to go through it again but I want to remember this. Not to hold a grudge, but to be a reminder of why practicing Satyam is important and maybe think about what the impact of what I would consider a white lie could potentially be. It could be hurtful to the person I am saying it to. So also in a sense, satyam also ties into Ahimisa (non-violence). And being non-truthful could also very well come back and kick me in the rear end.